The streets are empty … but what’s that creaking sound? The eerie music is a dead giveaway … pun intended … .
The lights go out at Captain Skippy’s. Closing time.
Pablo and Consuela park that blue junker of theirs behind the radio station.
Consuela: “Dios! Pablo, you hear that?”
Pablo: “Es nada. C’mon, tonight we roll some Gringos good!”
The graveyard. Scratching sounds. A stray dog, maybe? People should keep a closer eye on their pets.
Security guard Tim Miller prowls the grounds of Davis Manufacturing. What was that noise? “Hey! Who’s there?”
Unquiet nights find survivalist Mike Bullock on the roof of his house, scanning the approaches. A sound! What could it … ah, just Ruthie the waitress, walking home from the evening shift at Captain Skippy’s.
Pablo: “Old man Crawford gots the righteous wheels. I say we hit the cruise with this shit ‘fore we sell it for chop.”
Consuela: “Yeah, hurry up. I don’ like this.”
Shadowy figures shamble through a sleeping trailer park.
Doug Irwin, “the Alligator Poacher”: “You’d be truly surprised how many dangerous animals you can find in perfectly normal towns. Especially when you reach under things without wearing gloves, like I intend to do tonight. I – Krikey! Why’s that girl running across the road like that? And screaming?”
An explosion splits the night at the HUD-subsidized Meadows Apartments. It looks like people got out, though. Shambled out. And is that one carrying … a human thighbone?!
Irwin: “Krikey! Look at ‘em all! That great big one there’s especially dangerous. These things can rip you apart, and they will, just to get to your brains. It’s their sole diet, the same way koalas can eat only eucalyptus leaves. These ones are pretty riled; I think they’re hungry. I’m gonna let ‘em get closer to the windows so you can all get a good look.”
Zombies: “Brains … Brains … !”
Gay civil rights lawyer Peter Long and his … um … staffpersons Johnson and Bruce flag down Officer Chuck. From the opposite side, zombies close in … .
The worst has happened. The wargame store is on fire! They shall pay … they shall all pay … .
Consuela split – chickenshit bitch – but that’s OK. Pablo’s hooked up with Snake the Biker and one of them strippers with legs up to her … hehe, and the pickings! Civil unrest is a looter’s best friend! Now to get out of here, car’s just around back of the Game Gear …
Pablo: “Aaaaaagghhhhh….!!” (Spurts impossibly large amount of blood)
Two overloaded cars carry survivors toward a safe hiding spot. But safe for how long?
With a soundtrack all its own, a strangely familiar red-and-black van comes tearing down the street!
Zombie parts splatter from the front grille. Blood and intestines smear the road.
Hannibal: “There are civilians holed up in Neil’s shop. We’ve gotta get ‘em in the van. BA, can you hold off those zombies?”
BA: “Can I? I pity da fools.” (begins firing automatic weapon that doesn’t ever seem to run out of ammo.)
Hannibal: “This door’s stuck. Get me a demo charge!”
Captain Skippy: “I can see them from up here - they’re all heading this way!”
Ruthie: “We’re all gonna die!!”
Irwin: “It’s important to remember not to drive over too many zombies, because even with a rugged truck like this enough body parts stuck in your undercarriage can bring you to a grinding halt. But the resourceful wilderness expert knows to climb on top of his vehicle in the event of a breakdown. Animals have a harder time reaching you when you're higher up, and it’s a better vantage for a rifle shot. But make sure you keep track of how many you’ve fired, because you don’t want to get caught empty. … was that five, or six?”
