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Rules set: Skank
Miniatures: The Zombietown Cast, Grays, Koralons, Bug-Men
Setting: A small town, somewhere in America. Perhaps near you?
| Early surveillance photos show a landing party of Koralon snake-men emerging from behind Farmer Floyd's gas station. A law enforcement unit can be seen in the background, responding to a complaint of unusual activity in the area. | |
| Another photo, taken almost simultaneously on the opposite side of town, shows a crew of Grays bent on abduction. Preferably of young boys, or attractive men. | |
| Here we see bug-man warriors advancing through the manufacturing district in the service of their queen. They have discovered that Earth, too, has its bugs. Could this be the Motherbug? | |
| And contact is initiated! A security camera in Captain Skippy's Seafood Grotto captured the first fatality of the incident, a starship-stowaway named Jar-Jar Binks. The good captain does not have a "shoot on sight" policy for most patrons that enter his establishment, but in this case he made an exception. | |
| As the alien landing parties encountered one another and began to fight over the limited supply of abduction subjects, they discovered that humans can fight back too! Here we see well-known crocodile hunter Steve Irwin, stepping out of the Loaf and Jug minimart to discover a most unlikely figure tampering with his truck. Later, he is fallen beside his vehicle in the wake of a plasma beam. But he managed to take three Grays - and the mini-mart - with him. What was he doing with all that dynamite in his truck, anyway? |
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| Little Timmy plays with his toy dump truck outside The Meadows, a HUD-certified apartment complex where he lives with his mother and her current boyfriend. Mommy told him to stay away from strange people out on the street. But these obviously aren't people. So it must be OK. | |
| Moments later, The Meadows is caught between the lines of battle as the bug-man crew closes in on its back door. Lasers and plasma weapons are discharged. Can you say "Urban Renewal?" | |
| Bug-men defend their captured Motherbug against Koralon aggression outside the only slightly foul-smelling Four Seasons hotel. | |
| There was no alien activity evident around the home and office of gay civil rights lawyer Peter Long when gun-shop proprietor "Crazy" Neil fired an antitank rocket through the back window. But I suppose it pays to be thorough. | |
| As dawn breaks in the East, smoke billows from a plethora of sources all over town. Time to call FEMA, and settle in for a lengthy coverup - I mean, emergency intervention .... | |
As wargames go, this one was extremely tongue-in-cheek. The Koralons were typical B-movie aliens; their spaceship was low on food and their victory conditions involved carrying off as many edible corpses as possible. The bug-men, on the other hand, had come to Earth to lay eggs in living hosts - and keep those hosts from being eaten before the eggs hatched. And the Grays - you know Grays. They're those ones that (so says the National Enquirer) keep waylaying disoriented elderly people and administering anal probes to them. It's true, and they pay good money to their travel agents for the opportunity. (Think of them as a sort of interstellar Club Med.) But how gross is it when someone does that sort of thing to your food? Or your kids' - is "wet nurse" the appropriate term? Ewww. Butts definitely had to be kicked. Or ... something.
- Vynnie
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